The Details

As I write this, I am sitting in an airport watching people and wondering where they are going , where they came from, and what their individual story is. I wonder what events have occurred through their lifetime to bring them to this point and what people God has used through that process. Maybe there was one person that had an enormous impact on them that drastically changed the trajectory of their life. When I think about how someone can make such a profound change in the life of another human being I wonder, could I ever make an impact like that? I believe that this is the business God is in and if we have the desire to serve Him and willingness to allow Him to work through us, I must answer with an emphatic “yes.” Personally, I can’t think of many ways more powerful to impact a life than through adoption, which is certainly at the heart of God! Does this mean that He cares about ALL of the details? Of course he cares about the details, especially when it comes to the life of one of His precious children!

I only started working at Lifeline two months ago and one of the biggest things God has had to remind me of over and over again is that He is in control of all 143 million orphans in the world…He very much cares about the details! In my heart, I know this to be true but working in an environment where I see all of the details, all the hard work, all the paper work, and all of the logistics behind each adoption and foster care placement, it would be easy to quickly forget that God is in control of all these facets and so much more. I can imagine that someone who has been or is currently in the adoption/foster care process has likely struggled with some of these very same thoughts themselves. These families spend an enormous amount of time filling out paper work, going through training, reading books, answering questions, and I’m sure at times they feel as if the ultimate fate of what child will become a part of their family for eternity is up to a random conglomeration of themselves, social workers, agency workers, national workers, or even government officials. Yes, God chooses to use all of these people in this miraculous process and yes they have important roles to play, but God is leaving His fingerprints throughout the entire process if we are in accordance with His almighty will (including every single piece of paper). I believe we should work diligently and faithfully “as for the Lord and not for men (Col. 3:23)” on whatever part we play in the process, but remember that ultimately only God is in control—for after all, they are His children. What a blessing it is to serve a God who cares about everything from a precious child to a lifeless stack of papers!

Whitney White
International Education Counselor

The Truth of Adoption

I was recently invited to lead an adoption workshop at a national conference for workers and volunteers of crisis pregnancy centers. Since this was a large conference, I was admittedly nervous and secretly hoping that my little workshop would be just that – a “little” workshop. Despite my trepidations, I earnestly sought the Lord’s favor for the workshop and prayed specifically that He would place the right people there. Understanding that adoption is often misunderstood, I weighed the possible responses to the topic at hand but chose not to shy away from the truth of this option for women facing unplanned pregnancies.

Fifteen minutes before the workshop, I stood shaking in my sandals, eyeing the door. As the Lord would have it, there was standing room only when the doors finally closed. After making my introductions, my nerves never settled, but the crowd did. They listened intently as I spoke about adoption as a real option for women and one that can end cycles of early pregnancy within families. As anticipated, there were opinions galore in that classroom (one thing I have learned as an adoption educator is there is a lot of work still to do!) Amidst the protests of some people, an attractive, middle-aged lady spoke out against the crowd. Her testimony went something like this:

“Sitting through this presentation is bittersweet for me. I aborted my son thirty years ago. But hearing this information today, I wonder if I would have made the same decision then had my counselor shared this with me.”

I let out a sigh of relief. There really wasn’t any need for me to add or take away from what she had said. The power of the truth of God’s word is just that - powerful.

Regardless of the initials we have (or don’t have) behind our names, we are all responsible for the truth we’ve been given. And the truth is, God created each of us in His wonderful image. We are “fearfully and wonderfully” made and intended to live lives for His glory. I believe His desire for every woman who walks through the door of our agency, a crisis pregnancy center or abortion clinic is that they would know Him and the abundant life He has promised through Christ. For women who have not experienced open doors and who have been told that their futures are limited because of their circumstances, cultures, or pasts, there is the option of adoption that promises hope and change for them and the lives of their children.

Traci Newell
Education Coordinator

Partners of Lifeline

Earlier in the year, I was thrilled to receive a call from Nancy Ryan, Chairperson of The Optimist Club of Birmingham. Nancy learned of Lifeline’s ministry from a former intern, who thought the Optimists would be great partners with us. Since then, Nancy and The Optimist Club have embraced our foster families in a number of ways. Lifeline has been chosen as a recipient of one of their programs called “Kards for Kids”, which benefits foster youth living locally. Through the program, gift cards are given to foster children at Christmas time and awareness and support of foster care and adoption are raised. Donors are needed for the program.

To round out the year, The Optimist Club is also providing a place and volunteers for an evening of respite for our foster families. I thank the Lord for servants like these who are willing to give of their time and energy to support and refresh foster families. Because of partnerships like this one, we are able to offer our foster parents and children the support they need and deserve!

Traci Newell
Education Coordinator

The Ministry of Foster Care

In May, Lifeline began a new series of required classes for prospective foster parents at the Church at Brook Hills. These prospects, young and older, married and single, share a common thread: their desire to be the hands and feet of Christ to children in their communities who are hurting and vulnerable. For many of these families, the classes provide information that is new and sometimes alarming (it is difficult to hear about the abuse that takes place in our own neighborhoods). As one participant put it on Sunday night, “It is overwhelming.” But even with their trepidations, these families seem to agree that foster care is ministry. One meaning of ministry is service. Foster families are servants. They serve DHR by providing much needed transportation to/from doctor’s and school appointments. They serve the birth families by providing safe, nurturing homes for their children, and they serve the children in care by taking them into their homes and feeding, clothing and loving them. Most importantly, they point these children and families to Christ, the Greatest Servant of all.

“Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death -- even death on a cross!” --Philippians 2:5-8

Traci Newell
Education Coordinator

Education Update: Excited About Adoption

Last week I had the privilege of attending a pro-life conference in Orlando, Florida, hosted by Heartbeat International. Among the keynote speakers was Pam Tebow, mother of famed football quarterback, Tim Tebow. As I sat among the hundreds of professionals and volunteers committed to taking the message of life to those most vulnerable to abortion, I was filled with joy to see Christ exalted in that room. It occurred to me that, this passion and desire to see life fulfilled, comes from the Author of life. My purpose for going to the conference was to facilitate a workshop on adoption for other attendees. So with laptop and power point in hand, I set off to my training room to share what I am surrounded by daily – adoption. The title of my workshop, “Debunking Adoption Myths for Pregnant Teens,” certainly drew interest, but it was people’s excitement about adoption that was most interesting to me. I sometimes forget that adoption is still the least popular option for women facing unplanned pregnancy, and the material that I have shared dozens of times, is still new to many.

Upon my return home, I wrapped up the week with a marathon of the program “Decisions, Choices and Options” at a local high school. My co-leader and I had been invited to present to seven different classes of ninth graders. The students, though typical teens, were attentive and even offered comments and raised questions. After the presentations, several students came up to me and proudly shared that they were adopted. As an adoptive mother, it was affirming to hear these young people announce their adoptions with pride – not with shame or loss – that we so often hear about in the world.

The whirlwind of excitement that last week brought also brought personal feelings of inadequacy. Why would anyone want to listen to me? In fact, there was nothing stunning about me or my presentations, but what captivates people, I believe, is the message of adoption itself. Truly, it is a message that is filled with hope for everyone. When we consider what adoption means, we cannot ignore that God Himself speaks of our adoption into His family through His Son, Jesus. When we turn to Christ, we have the promise that God will not leave us as orphans. May I never grow jaded to all that adoption is.

“I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.” John 14:18

Traci Newell
Education Coordinator

Upcoming Adoption Training

On Tuesday, April 20th, Lifeline will be leading an adoption training titled, “How to Talk about Adoption,” for employees and volunteers of crisis pregnancy centers throughout the state. Lifeline’s partnership with these centers over the years has been an invaluable part of our ministry to birth mothers. Many times, young women who have gone to such centers for counseling have been referred to Lifeline to make an adoption plan. By offering adoption education to those who may be the birth mother’s first point of contact, we hope to diminish fears of discussing adoption with clients for whom parenting may not be the best choice.

“How to Talk about Adoption” will be held at Briarwood Presbyterian Church in Fellowship Hall C. Registration will begin at 9:45, and the training will last from 10:00 until 3:00. Lunch will be served. Social work and nursing CEUs are available. If interested in attending the training, please contact Traci Newell, Education Coordinator, at traci.newell@lifelineadoption.org or 205-972-8467.

Birth Mother Mentors

Last Saturday was Lifeline’s first ever Birth Mother Mentor training. Around ten o’clock that morning, a dozen or so of us filed into a room complete with beautiful tables, candies, notebooks and pens, ready to learn about “the birth mother”. That term means different things to different people; for some, she is the person who carried them for nine months, for others, she is the lady in the grocery store who is “due any day”, and yet, for adoptive children and families, she is the unsung hero – the person God uses to bring lives and families into existence. For me, she is the face of my children (yes, I am an adoptive mother of two daughters and could not wear that banner without their birth mothers.)

I am convinced that God “sees” the birth mother. Perhaps her struggle is unique from anyone else’s. Remember Hagar, birth mother of Ishmael? We can learn about her in Genesis, chapter 16. When pregnant and mistreated by her mistress, she fled to the desert and sought refuge by a spring. The angel of the Lord found her there and comforted her with His words; in response, she said “You are the God who sees me.” God has indeed looked down and seen the birth mothers who have sought refuge at Lifeline. He has provided safety, food, clothing and loving house parents for hundreds of birth mothers who have lived at our maternity home. He has placed Christian counselors on staff in the lives of birth mothers who have needed to hear about His Son’s sacrifice for them and their children, and now it seems He is providing mentors to walk alongside our birth mothers and minister to their physical and emotional needs.

We look forward to what God can do through the mentors of these birth mothers. Although adoption has great gains for all those involved, it is a difficult decision for the birth mother and is one accompanied by loss for her. For those birth mothers without a support system in place, our mentors can fill in the gaps and remind them of the selfless decision they are making through adoption. Please pray for the birth mother who, like Hagar, may feel hopeless and alone but may one day be able to say: “I have now seen the One who sees me.” (Genesis 16:13)

For more information on becoming a birth mother mentor, contact Traci at traci.newell@lifelineadoption.org.

Traci Newell
Education Coordinator

Education Update

February 15, 2010

Tonight was a milestone for a new crop of prospective foster parents who have “grabbed the bull by the horns” and set out for the amazing adventure (and sometimes wild ride) that is foster care. This was the half-way mark for these families who have committed to sit through ten weeks of formal training in preparation to become foster parents. As a result of last September’s foster care/adoption summit hosted by The Church of Brook Hills, many local families have stepped out on faith and have begun the required training called GPS (Group Preparation and Selection.) I am a veteran and believer of GPS; I have taught so many of these classes that I’ve lost count, but praise the Lord, I have never lost the motivation for doing them. Although dated in some of its language, the curriculum holds true. The needs of children in care twenty years ago are the same today. These children, who’ve been removed from their birth families’ homes, have experienced innumerable losses. Essentially everything that is familiar to them (whether good or bad) is changed in a matter of minutes when someone decides they are not safe where they are. What most people don’t realize is the string of events often set in motion by that first move. The reality for foster children is not a single move, but many times, multiple moves. Bouncing from home to home certainly has its impact on these kids, and their very ability to form healthy, “normal” relationships can be altered.

So what’s the good news? God has called the church to provide safe, temporary homes for these children. Imagine the possibilities of Christ’s disciples working alongside hurting birth families to provide nurturing, healthy homes for their children. Imagine opportunities to share Christ with the single mother (or father) who is caught in a snare of poverty, alcoholism/drug addiction and abuse. I am convinced that foster care is not only for the child, but for the family too. If reunification with the birth family is the goal, then teaching birth families how to parent their children is essential. How wonderful an opportunity Christian foster families are given to make an impact in the lives of these children and their families; even if the time with the child is short, it can be impactful and can make a difference for a lifetime!

Traci Newell
Education Coordinator

Decisions, Choices & Options Update

Last night was a truly eye-opening experience. My co-leader, Lee Karcher, and I set out for Sulligent, Alabama, in response to an invitation to present “Decisions, Choices & Options” (a pro-abstinence/pro-adoption program for teens) at Sulligent United Methodist Church. We were treated with such hospitality by the adults but didn’t know what to expect from the 20 or so teens who sat staring at us from the pews of the sanctuary. Honestly, I sometimes assume as a trainer that my audience will know all the answers before I speak; and the group last night knew a lot, but what was most revealing were their responses on a confidential survey taken before and after the presentation. As we were driving back to the office following our time with the youth, Lee read aloud some of their responses, and I felt a renewed sense of motivation for doing these trainings.

According to the survey, 60% of the teens present last night had some change in thinking after sitting through the presentation. Prior to the presentation, 40% of the kids felt that adoption means abandoning your child; following the presentation, all 40% had experienced a change of heart, or at least a change of mind. Pre-presentation, 50% of the kids stated they felt adoption is not a good option for a pregnant teen; post-presentation, 85% of those in attendance decided that adoption is a good option for a teen facing pregnancy. Both before and after the training, 100% stated their belief that abortion is not a good option.

After last night, I have learned to squash my assumptions and trust that the Lord may very well reveal something new to a teenager or adult who hasn’t considered adoption as a viable option for the unborn child and his birth parents. We still have much to do, but I stand amazed at how God seems to be working through adoption education.

Traci Newell
Education Coordinator

"Exciting things are happening..."

So many exciting things are happening on the education front at Lifeline. Herbie and I had an opportunity to present “Decisions, Choices and Options” to a group of approximately 20 kids this past Sunday night. The material was well received by the youth and we were encouraged that this curriculum does make an impact! The kids’ expressions as we shared information on abortion really painted a picture of how much kids don’t know about this process. Herbie’s testimony on the importance of a father in a child’s life was powerful and especially hit home with the young men in the group. With several more of these presentations on the horizon, we need prayer in order to be effective communicators.

This week invitations for training are being sent out to women who have expressed an interest in mentoring a birth mother here at Lifeline. As birth mother mentors, these volunteers will be able to provide much needed spiritual and emotional support to women facing crisis pregnancies. The training is scheduled for February 20th at 10:00 a.m. and will be held at McElwain Baptist Church in Birmingham.

Traci Newell
Education Coordinator

Gifts of Grace

"As each one has received a gift, minister it to one another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God...if anyone ministers, let him do it as with the ability which God supplies, that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belong the glory and the dominion forever and ever. Amen." 1 Peter 4:10, 11

As we were in prayer today, we prayed for Traci Newell, our Education Coordinator. Traci will visit a local school in an attempt to gain permission to present the "Decisions, Choices and Options" training to the high school students. I thought about how gifted Traci is at this type of task and how I am not gifted at this at all! I thanked the Lord that each of the staff is so uniquely gifted at what each of us does...that God has put the Lifeline staff together as a puzzle; fitting together to form a beautiful picture of how Christians can come together to fulfill God’s will for our community and our world.

Lea Anne Parker
Senior Supervisor of Social Services