Some thoughts..

One thing I understand is:

Christ has saved me from myself.  This is always how I’ve understood my salvation.  I understand that what happened on the cross that day gave way for true life, hope and purpose.  It saved me from the evil one who seeks to kill, steal and destroy. There is power in Jesus’ name. 

One thing I’m seeing is:

People of the spirit are just little pieces of Him walking around with skin on. God speaks to us through His word but He also uses the people around us.  And what about those times when I’ve felt I have nothing to offer?  That there is nothing in me that is capable of returning the love and grace that I’ve been shown.  I can only pray that God will be able to use what I’ve walked through for His glory someday.  We’ve all felt pain.  We’ve all dealt with things that we wouldn’t wish on anyone else.  But to get to use those lessons to spur one another on towards freedom from darkenss? Yes. That is it.  That makes it all worthwhile.  We are in this human thing together.

One thing I’m learning is:

We must be careful on where our worth is placed.  I believe sometimes we leave it places that we didn’t know we left it, and then when the boat is rocked and our worth falls from that place, we crumble.

In the end:

…it comes back to identity.  Every day, we are one step closer to knowing the depth of His love for us. I pray that is the case.

Questions I have:

Maybe understanding our identity is just part of the journey to sanctification.  Maybe it’s not something that clicks one day or maybe it is. Maybe it’s different for everyone.  I am starting to believe that if I truly lived as if I understood who God says I am, things would look different in my life. Props to the folks who look like they have it together.  I don’t believe that I’ve looked like that a day in my life.  Maybe it’s ok to be an open book.  I find that my problem is that I stay on chapter 2 of my open book.  It’s hard for me to step forward into the unknown.  Am I really one of those folks that sits in darkness just because the darkness is familiar?  What does trust really look like then? There comes a time when faith does require action and I feel l sit on the fence of that.

What this is:

I know I know. What is this, right? True confessions of the bookkeeper?  But these are the thoughts I have in this season of life.  And I must believe that it is a season.  In the words of a sweet coworker, I will look back on this time in my life and laugh because I will be able to see then what God was up to.  Man, I hope so.  Until then….. I’m pressing on and pressing in with the help of some wonderful friends and family.  I know it’s worth it.  I believe it’s worth it. HE is worth it.

Lauri Mehaffey, Bookkeeper

It's all about perspective...

As I ponder over the thoughts that Mary and Martha might have had as their brother Lazarus was sick and near death, I can only imagine their sense of urgency, heartache, and wonder.  We read in John 11, the sisters sent to Jesus a message about their brother’s health, believing that Jesus has power over sickness.  Surprisingly instead of coming quickly, Jesus remained where He was for 2 days and meanwhile Lazarus past away.  Did Mary and Martha think Jesus forgot or that Jesus was late?  Did they plan for the results to be different?  Did the sisters wonder why Jesus allowed Lazarus to die?  Did they ask questions and demand answers?  If I was in their shoes, I am sure I would have these thoughts.  Don’t these emotions sound familiar as we, adoptive families, wonder why we wait?  Or question God’s timing in bringing our son or daughter home?  We wonder why this step or that process is staying where it is for an extra 2 days, weeks, or months.

John 11 reminds me every time that it is ALL ABOUT PERSPECTIVE.  It’s all about a perspective that is not of this world and one we can only be given through God’s grace.  It is an eternal perspective.  It is realizing that the words Jesus spoke, “This illness does not lead to death.  It is for the glory of God, so that the Son of God may be glorified through it” (John 11:4) must be central in our lives.  We must realize that the glory of God is worth the journey we walk through adoption.  The moments where we wonder what is happening, we must hold fast our confidence in the Lord.  It’s an eternal perspective that will carry us through the times of uncertainty, change, and the burden of urgency. 

We must know God’s character of love, goodness, and grace and believe that he plans all things for our good.  We must walk each day in the light, as scripture says, “If anyone walks in the day, he does not stumble, because he sees the light of this world.” (John 11:9) Because at the end of our journey, Jesus will prove his timing is always best.  Although the disciples and the sisters thought Jesus was late, He showed himself faithful when He called Lazarus to come out. 

Be encouraged as you walk through along the path of your adoption and remember that it’s all about perspective.. an eternal perspective.  A perspective that truly believes God’s timing is never late.  The adoption journey is full of emotions, hard decisions, uncertain answers, and possible changes; however, we can humbly make it through as we rest in Christ.

Logan Gibbons, International Adoption Specialist

Streams of Mercy...

:Adopt: 

"to choose to take as one's own; make one's own by selection; to take or receive into any kind of new relationship." 

"to affirm, embrace, seize, take over"

           My name is Hillary and I am currently working at Lifeline! I just joined the family a few weeks ago and I am so happy to be blogging today!
           A few weeks ago I was asked to blog about my adoption story. So my prayer is that you are encouraged and filled up with the Father’s love and affection for you as you read what He has done in my life!
           At six weeks old, I was adopted into a wonderful family. I have a wonderful mother, father, and older brother. Through the years I have also gained a sister-in-law and a niece and a nephew who is due in a few months!
            I always knew I was adopted. My parents always told me I was adopted, and always wanted me to know. They always told me I was theirs from the beginning and that they never wanted to keep it from me. The funny thing is when I tell people I am adopted, they look very surprised because I look a lot like my mom and dad! Even my best friend in high school didn’t believe I was adopted!
            I grew up in an amazing and loving home. My family is very important to me and I am so thankful that the Lord chose them to be my family. Through the Lord, I have been blessed with a huge family on my dad’s side (30+ cousins!) and a small, loving and caring family on my mom’s side. There was never a time in my life that I didn’t feel loved by my family. My mom tells me stories of the first day they brought me home from the agency. She told me of the many family members and friends that came by the house the first day I was home. So it is safe to say, I was loved from the moment my parents brought me home.
            Again, I went through life always knowing I was adopted. Though at a young age I didn’t really understand what that meant. As I became older, I grew more and more interested about my birth mom. We did not have much information on her except we knew she was a young teenager when she became pregnant. When I was in 10^th grade, I became even more interested in finding out who my birth mother is. My English teacher in high school gave a persuasive writing assignment one day in class. A topic that was listed was “Open v Closed Adoption.” She approached me and said that she thought I would like to write on this because she knew I was adopted. From there, I began researching about open and closed adoption which led me to contacting my adoption agency to ask them about these topics. A long story short, I finished the paper with a greater knowledge on these topics but also with a new interest.
            After I finished the paper, I remember riding in the car with my mom and asking her about possibly contacting my birth mom. At first, I was nervous because I didn’t want to hurt my parents by asking them about my birth mom. But again, I know the Lord chose them to be my parents for a reason. From the very beginning, my parents have been 110% supportive. I know this process was extremely hard for them. I knew it was going to be hard to somewhat, let me go and find out “who I am.” While in the car, my mom told me that I had a letter that my birth mother had written me. At the time I didn’t know that I had a letter, so I was really anxious to read it. The agreement was that when I turned 18, I would be able to read the letter.
            So fast forward a few years and it is my 18^th birthday. My parents handed me a handwritten letter that my birth mother had written 18 years ago. At first I didn’t cry when I read it, but a few months later, I sat down by myself and read the letter again and began to cry. I cried because my birth mother told me how much she loved me and that she wanted the best for me. I cried because I saw how a young teenager had to make such a grown-up decision. Reading her letter made me realize that she had to give up a lot in order that I could live and have a life she wanted me to have. I never had a doubt that my birth mother didn’t love me. And through the letter, I began seeing not only her heart but the Lord’s heart for me.

I will not leave you as orphans;

I will come to you.

-John 14:18

            The letter sparked many thoughts about where I came from and what my birth mother was like. When I turned 19, I was able to access my file at the adoption agency and begin searching for my birth mother. It took a few months but when we found her, I really wanted to communicate with her. Through the social worker at the agency, my birth mother and I were able to communicate through emails. She told me where she has been the past few years and what she was doing now. She even sent me current pictures of her and her family. It was really neat being able to see what she looks like and getting to see that she has a family of her own! I was able to tell her about myself through emails, but I felt that I was unable to communicate what I was feeling. I expressed to her that I really would like to have a phone call with her and be able to talk verbally. So a few months pass, and the time came for she and I to talk on the phone. I was nervous, excited, along with other emotions. When she picked up the phone, it was awkward at first, but then we began talking. One thing I will never forget from the phone call is that Jen (my birth mom) told me that she never forgot about me and that she always thought of me. I knew that she probably thought of me but hearing her say that just made me stand back and realize the sacrifice she made 20 years ago. I explained to her that I really wanted to talk on the phone so that I could express how thankful I am. I was able to share with her what the Lord had done in my life because of the choice she made 20 years ago. I told her that I really wanted to meet her so I could thank her in person. I will always remember that day and how I became even more thankful for God’s sovereignty not only in my life, but in Jen’s life as well.
            So what does being adopted mean to me? Being adopted has added a lot to my life. I probably wouldn’t be here today if it wasn’t for Jen’s decision. About two years ago, the Lord really opened my eyes to what being adopted means. Going back to the letter she wrote me, seeing how much she truly loved me, the Lord opened my eyes to see that just like Jen, He too had given up so much for me to live. He had given up His Son so that I could live and have the life He always wanted me to have. He too faced the pain, of given up someone that He loved so dearly so that other’s might live. He has dreams for me and plans for me that I cannot even fathom. Though I was saved at age 13, I began to fall in love with the Lord even more through this new journey in my life. As I tried to process all of what the Lord was showing me, He revealed even more to me! He brought these verses to my mind:

“For you formed my inward parts;

You knitted me together in my

Mother’s womb.

I praise You, for I am fearfully and

wonderfully made.

Wonderful are Your works;

My soul knows it very well.

My frame was not hidden

from You,

when I was made in the secret,

intricately woven in the depths of

the earth.

Your eyes saw my unformed

substance;

in Your book were written, every one

Of them,

The days that were formed for me,

When as yet there was none of them.”

-Psalm 139:13-16 (ESV)

Though I had heard and read this verse many times in my life, this was the first time I began to actually see this verse come alive. The Lord began reminding me that He had (and still has) a plan for me even before I was thought of, even before He created the universe, before all these things, He knew me. I began to cry thinking of how great the Father is! The days that are before me now, “…were formed for me.” You and I have a purpose here. I wasn’t some mistake in a teenager’s life and you weren’t a mistake either. The Lord began to pour His thoughts into my mind and tell me that He has a plan for my life. In the midst of graduating college, trying to find a job, a place to live, in all the craziness, He, the Creator of everything you and I see, has a plan not just for me, but for every single person. He has a plan that is better than anything I can ever imagine. Knowing that my future is in the hands of a Sovereign and Faithful God quieted my anxious heart. My heart became so full of how He has orchestrated every single detail in my life (big and small). 

Being adopted has opened so many doors in my life. I have been able to connect with others around me, and tell them my story. I have also been given so many opportunities in my life. I have been blessed with an amazing family and friends. I have been able to go on several mission trips and most importantly, I have been able to hear the gospel proclaimed throughout my life. Through Jen’s self-less decision, and through the Lord’s renewing mercies, I have been given “a hope and a future.”

For [the Spirit which] you have now received [is] not a

spirit of slavery to put you once more in bondage to fear,

but you have received the Spirit of adoption

[the Spirit producing sonship]

in [the bliss of] which

we cry, Abba (Father)! Father!

-Romans 8:15 (Amplified Bible)

Throughout this journey, the Lord has given me a heart for the orphans in our world today. He has also given me a burden for the young women who find themselves in a crisis pregnancy or who have taken the route of abortion. The Lord opened my eyes to see how these women need Him just as much as you and I do. Though I rejoice that the Lord has saved me, I don’t need to just stop there. I need to, as Psalm 107:2 says, “Let the redeemed of the Lord tell their story…” I need to tell my story to as many that will hear. He has brought life into these bones so that I may proclaim Him in all that I do. So, through our rejoicing, let us also lift up a mighty roar to Heaven with our prayers for those who have yet to know who Jesus is and proclaim Him as their Savior! Again, He has created us for a higher purpose!

            Many asked me during the process of finding my birth mom, “What if she doesn’t want to know anything about you?” or “What if she doesn’t want to talk to you?” Though I had asked myself the same questions, the Lord calmed my fears with His voice of Truth. He reminded me that even if Jen didn’t want to know anything about me or didn’t want to have communication with me, it doesn’t matter. My identity isn’t in what other people tell me. My identity is found in the Father. He sees me as His child and calls me His beloved, and if all others forsake me, He will remain the same. I have seen the gospel more clearly even through these past few years. I have seen how my life, without Christ, is just like the orphans we work with. I was hopeless, fatherless, and homeless. But through the Lord’s Sovereign hand, I have been given hope, a family, and now, a new name. What an amazing Father you and I have!

But when the time arrived that set by God the Father,

God sent His Son, born among us of a woman,

born under the conditions of the law

so that He might redeem those of us who have been

kidnapped by the law.

Thus we have been set free to experience our rightful heritage.

You can tell for sure that you are now fully adopted

as His own children because God sent the Spirit of His Son

into our lives crying out, "Papa! Father!"

Doesn't that privilege of intimate conversation 

with God make it plain that 

you are not a salve,

but a child?

And if you are a child, you're 

also an heir, with complete access to the inheritance.

-Galatians 4:4-7 (The Message)

Hillary Dickey, Administrative Assistant

You will never be too old to want a family...

I read the below blog post on the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption website several months ago. The words of this young women so moved me that I wanted to share it with our Lifeline family. If you are interested in our foster care program, please contact the office and ask to speak with someone in our Foster Care Department.

Amy Griner, Domestic Social Worker

 

You will never be too old to want a family...

After unpacking my belongings on Taylor University’s campus in 2004, I melted onto my twin-sized bed in relief; I was officially an adult. Starting that August day, I was financially and emotionally on my own. There would be no more moving homes, no more veiled threats, no more walking on already cracked eggshells around new people. Two days later, it hit me that the oft uttered “on my own” was a mere euphemism for the estimated 29,000 children who will age of foster care this year and will be “all alone.” I was paralyzed by the knowledge that there would be no one to check on my well-being, no financial safety net, and no one to help navigate various barriers in place on a college campus. That first year was terrifying. I was alone, depressed, broke, and furious that, at 18, the system just dumped me.

While I could speak volumes on the aging out process and the system, this not a commentary about a foster care system under increasing pressure to find permanent homes for the hundreds of thousands of children in foster care. This is a post for the families. An ode of sorts for those who give with no ulterior motives, who never stop inviting people into their homes and their hearts, who never lock their refrigerators, and who endlessly and (some might say) recklessly pour into the lives of foster youth.

I was a sophomore in college when I found my forever family; well past the age of “adoptability.” I had long given up on finding a family and was focused on just “making it” when I miraculously stumbled into a loud, boisterous, laughter-filled, caring, and passionate family. It started when I came home with my “sister” for Thanksgiving to escape the dull of the dorms. They were the craziest, loudest, biggest family I’d ever had the pleasure of hanging out with. I came back for Christmas, New Year, and Easter. Each year for every holiday, I was invited back. In 2009, I reached a milestone. Five years was the longest I had ever spent with any family in my life; after that, it was just icing on the cake.

I won’t lie and say that it was easy to come into a new family at 19. It was awkward at first. I spent most of my time during the holidays quietly devouring books so as not to disturb the family dynamics and so I wouldn’t mess things up. Eventually though, my cousins conned me into one of their silly games, my “sister” would flop dramatically on my lap, an Indianapolis Colts game would be on, or we would all just gather for a few moments to listen to Grandma and Grandpa talk or pray for the family. I wept over simple things like actually having a stocking at Christmas, and family members who spelled my name correctly. Our relationship functioned much like a call and response — and they always responded. 

As time has gone on, things have also gotten “real.” As a family, we mourned the loss of close friends from Taylor, and later, the loss of our grandmother. I battled with my own trust issues and the wondered if I was “good enough” for my family. I often hid my struggles from them in an effort to prevent rejection. Eventually my own strength failed me: I reached out to the family who surrounded me with love, prayer, and grace as I battled through my first year of law school. They were beside me during the midnight calls, the times of self-doubt, and the two weeks that make up finals week.

The value of my family comes from the extraordinary things they do that they believe to be ordinary. Like making dried apples, mixing homemade hot chocolate, giving me one of Grandma’s quilts, sculpting butter trees (don’t ask), talking all night, doing crossword puzzles, and eating grapefruit while watching “How the Grinch Stole Christmas.” This year, I got to give Mother’s Day and Father’s Day gifts; and that is extraordinary. Most recently, while rushing out for work I glimpsed a letter in my mailbox from a member of my family letting me know that she thought I might like a nice note. Thank you Grandma S., I liked it very much. My family is not perfect, nor would they claim to be, but as many groups have stressed, you don’t have to be perfect, to be a family.

I write this blog to highlight a simple point: You will never be too old to want a family. My family is this wonderful, unexpected, hilarious, and compassionate gift from God and I feel honored to have them in my life. But it also saddens me that there are 107,000 other children waiting for their own imperfect family. Even more disheartening are the 29,000 children who will age out of foster care this year by stumbling into adulthood with little support.

So to the families who have heeded the call and continually open their homes to my many brothers and sisters in foster care … thank you, and may you inspire the masses.

By Sharde Armstong

(Sharde Armstrong, is currently a candidate for a Juris Doctor at New York University School of Law. She went to law school because of a belief that child welfare reform can often be accomplished via legislative and judicial action. Her interest in the foster care system stemmed from her own 12 years in foster care in Indiana and Michigan. After graduating from Taylor University in 2008 with a Bachelor’s in Psychology, she interned with the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute and Senator John Kerry.)

Joy, Unspeakable Joy!

As we celebrate the birth of our Savior this Christmas, as individuals, as families, and as cultures, I’ve been reflecting on how we all celebrate in various ways with different traditions. One of my favorite Christmas traditions is celebrating through music! Now, I’m not a very good singer by myself and I cannot play an instrument. I have more of what one would call a “congregational voice”. During December, I love nothing more than to listen to Christmas songs on the radio, attend Christmas programs in a variety of settings, and sing Christmas carols and songs with groups of people, large or small. I remember going Christmas caroling with the small church family I grew up in and attending a concert in an arena full of people gathered to enjoy a popular Christian artist’s newest Christmas tour. I cherish the old songs and thoroughly enjoy newly written songs about our Savior. Then there are also people who have arranged great combinations of the two.

So far this year I’ve attended a performance by the Samford University Band to hear my son play, a massive production put on at Dawson Memorial Baptist Church and an inspiring collection of songs performed at my own church, Valleydale Church. I also enjoyed singing one single song with folks at the Lifeline’s Foster Parent Christmas Party standing beside a foster dad holding a sleeping baby.. I even attended the University of Alabama’s graduation ceremony in which the university ensemble played Christmas music while we waited that surprisingly included “religious” Christmas songs. Every Christmas season I purchase a new Christmas CD to enjoy and add to the variety of ones I already have.

Christmas songs tell parts or all of the story of our Savior’s birth, remind us of prophecies about His coming, and express all the different emotions that we, as humans, feel as we try to grasp that the God and Creator of the universe would step out of His kingdom and take on the form of man in his most vulnerable state, a baby; that Jesus willingly took on human flesh as this baby, knowing that it meant He would lay down His life in order for the world (you, me, each person who has ever lived or will ever be born) to have the opportunity to be saved from God’s wrath because of our sin; to know that forgiveness, that peace, that hope of eternal life, that JOY!!!...Which leads me to share with you my favorite Christmas song.

It really is a tough choice as I enjoy so many! Every time I hear a different song, I’ll think or say: “Oh, I love that song!” or “This one is the best!” or “This is my favorite one” and on and on. But when it boils down to it, I definitely have to say my very favorite is “Joy to the World.” As you read the words below, I encourage you to do so aloud…..or maybe even sing it aloud right where you are.

“Joy to the World”
Words by Issac Watts; Music by George Fredrick Handel

Joy to the World, the Lord is come! Let earth receive her King; Let every heart prepare Him room, And Heaven and nature sing, And Heaven and nature sing, And Heaven, and Heaven, and nature sing. Joy to the World, the Savior reigns! Let men their songs employ; While fields and floods, rocks, hills and plains Repeat the sounding joy, Repeat the sounding joy, Repeat, repeat, the sounding joy. No more let sins and sorrows grow, Nor thorns infest the ground; He comes to make His blessings flowFar as the curse is found, Far as the curse is found, Far as, far as, the curse is found. He rules the world with truth and grace, And makes the nations prove, The glories of His righteousness, And wonders of His love, And wonders of His love, And wonders, wonders, of His love.

In God’s Word it says, “Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory.”
I Peter 1:8

I know that although this is a joy-filled time for many people, it is also the time of year when sadness is multiplied for those who have suffered loss—the death of a loved one, loss of a job, divorce, chronic illness, the death of a dream. This time last year, my Dad passed away after an extended illness. It was a difficult time for my family last Christmas and it continues to be a struggle as my family and I continue to miss Dad. But the pain is buffered by the knowledge that Dad believed in Christ as his Savior. I know Dad is in heaven, praising our Heavenly Father eternally. He has a new and healthy body, with no more pain, suffering or sadness. I know that he has received the fulfillment of his salvation and wouldn’t want to change places with any person on earth. Dad believed and he now sees his Savior’s face. And along with all the other believers who have past from this life, surround God’s throne and continually praise Him with joy that we can only attempt to express with mere words.

Amy with her dad as he told her his salvation experience for the first time in 1999.

I will exalt you, LORD, for you rescued me.
You refused to let my enemies triumph over me.
O LORD my God, I cried to you for help, and you restored my health.
You brought me up from the grave, O LORD.
You kept me from falling into the pit of death.
Sing to the LORD, all you godly ones! Praise his holy name.
For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime!
Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning.
Psalm 30:1-5

My prayer for you this Christmas season is that in the midst of any sorrow in your life, you will experience true joy that only comes from the King who heard our cries and became a baby to rescue us from our sin and despair, adopting us into His family, giving us eternal life.

Amy Griner
Domestic Social Worker

Esperanza – The Hopes and Dreams of the Orphan

Bogota, Columbia - On a nondescript street in the heart of Bogota stands 6 individual housing units scattered within the neighborhood. To a casual observer, you may believe that these units contain single families or a few multiple families, until you walk inside. Once inside, you find that these units are the homes of some 25 to 30 children who are being protected from the streets; from hunger, abuse, and the plague of being without a family.


Each unit is home to an age-segregated gender of children and within each unit is a small, dimly lit closet which contains all of the clothing, shoes, sheets, and worldly possessions belonging to these clusters of 25. Each child is relegated to a cubbyhole of about 4 cubit feet, and within these cubbies, each child has their own handmade, colored, wooden box.

This was the scene I experienced last week on the final day of our 6 day trip to Columbia. This was the very last orphanage we would visit before flying back home to the states, and we had almost canceled this stop for the sake of time. As I stood in this small closet, I couldn't take my eyes off of these multi-colored boxes. I was intrigued as to their purpose.

Raul, our trusty teammate, asked the director of the orphanage to please explain the meaning of these boxes to our team. She walked back into the closet, removed one of many boxes from a shelf, and clutched it in her hands. She explained in a soft Spanish the significance of these boxes.

"This is the only thing that truly belongs to our children. These boxes are the only thing they will keep. They are intensely personal to each child, and we have a rule that no one but the child who owns this box may ever open them or examine the contents inside until and if that child is adopted. Inside these boxes contain their most important trinkets and inside these boxes contains their hopes and dreams written upon slips of paper."

As I stared at the small box, possibly 8 inches long, 5 inches wide and 3 inches deep, I couldn't help but wonder what the owner of this box had written. What were the hopes and dreams of these little boys that filled the four walls of this home? Did they hope to sail the seas or climb mountains? Did they hope to play sports, to have a career, or to have a family? Did they dream that they could have a car, travel the world, or conquer battles? I was mesmerized by the contents of these precious boxes.

We asked the director, what - in her 12 years - had been some dreams she had discovered placed within the boxes. Were there certain hopes or dreams that seemed to be common or seemed to stand out? Then she told us, the number one dream in all of the boxes, for all the kids, no matter age or gender, was to have a family or to restore their broken families.

"O LORD, you hear the desire of the afflicted; you will strengthen their heart; you will incline your ear to do justice to the fatherless and the oppressed, so that man who is of the earth may strike terror no more." Psalm 10:17-18

May the Lord fulfill the dreams of these orphans to not only have an earthly family, but may these children find the hope of a Father whose adoption is perfect and eternal. May these children know the love of a God who allows our spirit's to cry out Abba, Father. May they come to know the Savior who says in John 14:18, "I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you."

Over 150 small boxes, on a nondescript street in Bogota, Columbia contain the hopes (Esperanza) and dreams of a fraction of those orphans living worldwide, but they poll the hearts of the 143 million orphans better than the Barna group, Gallup, and Rasmussen could do collectively. They show us that children were meant for families.

But it also shows us something about our own orphaned hearts. We were meant for a family. Our true dreams should not be for riches, wealth, prominence, power, or recognition, but for the fellowship with a Father who does not disappoint and for a life built upon displaying His glory to the world around us.

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart." Isaiah 29:11-13

Has the Lord put your family in a place where you could adopt or foster a precious child in need and in so doing meet their biggest dream? Has the Lord burdened you with his command in James 1:27 to care for orphans in distress? If so, partner with Lifeline today. Visit LifelineAdoption.org to donate to the cause, to apply to adopt, to sign up for a trip through our (un)adopted ministry by visiting orphans in need, to apply to be a foster parent for a child in US foster care, to volunteer in one of many ways for the sake of orphans, and ultimately to partner with us as we seek to meet the hopes and dream of the fatherless.

"For the needy shall not always be forgotten, and the hope of the poor shall not perish forever." Psalm 9:18

Oh beloved, will you allow God to use you to impact the life of a child? Please do not hesitate to give Lifeline a call because we are here...

On behalf of the orphans and fatherless.

Herbie Newell
Executive Director
Lifeline Children's Services
giving children a hope and a future
twitter: @hmnewell

Conversations with God

As I walked out of the ultrasound room, back to the waiting area of my Obstetrician’s office, I could hardly breathe. Trying so hard to keep my composure, hearing in my head over and over the words just spoken from the ultrasound technician, “There is no heartbeat, the baby stopped growing two weeks ago”. I was told to go back to see my doctor before I left. I signed in at the desk, just as I had done so many times, but this time knowing that if I as much said hello I was going to lose it. How could I love something so much that I had never seen? How could I have let myself get to such a vulnerable place? This moment took the journey that I had been going on for the past year in a new direction. You see, I had been married for 6 years, we had recently purchased our first home, and we were living the American dream and walking in blessings. So naturally, when we decided it was time to start a family, we never imaged that it would be a struggle. It took a year to get pregnant, which in my head was the longest year of my life at that point. Trying to figure out what I had done wrong and what I could do differently to deserve a child.

I have been a Christian since I was a kid. I have always said I trust God, I have always told people to trust God. So hear I am, with my feelings and my beliefs not lining up. How could I trust a God who gives me a child and takes it away? But I am supposed to trust God. “How could I not?” I would ask myself.

Three months after our loss, the doctor released us to start trying again for a baby. Remembering all the advise we had gotten, my husband being told to not to wear whitey-tightys, and for me to eat raisins, lentils, oysters and to cut caffeine, just to name a few. Month after month went by, continuing to visit Walgreen’s, CVS and Wal-Mart, to pick up my $12.99 box of pregnancy tests, continuing to get negatives. What was wrong with me? What could I do differently? God, are you there? I prayed every thing my little analytic mind could come up with. My evolving prayers went from the “begging” prayer- “God, pplleeasse let me be pregnant this month”, to

the “humble” prayer,

the “intellectual” prayer,

the “why” prayer,

the “logic” prayer,

the “enlarge my territory” prayer; and the faithful backup,

the “don’t you feel sorry for me” prayer. None of these seemed to work. So I came up with a new one. I began to ask God to take my desire away to have a child. Logically, this made sense to me. I had been doing great for years without a child, I can go back to that, right? So that was my new prayer. It seemed smart to me.

Through this journey of pain and self-discovery, I realized that I didn’t even really know what trusting in God meant. I just wanted it to be over. I began to realize that I was trusting in Him to do it my way, to bless me, after all, God is here for me, right? Well, “that’s ridiculous”, I would think, but that is how I was behaving.

As easy as it was to think, God CAN do it, and the fact that He’s not, means He’s punishing me, or doesn’t love me, or ignoring me. But I knew it wasn’t that simple. There must be something I need to learn.

“Every experience God gives us… is the perfect preparation for the future only He can see.” What beautifully profound words spoken by Corrie Ten Boom. I can hardly compare myself to someone who survived Hitler’s concentration camps, but my journey has certainly been bigger than what I thought I could handle.

So, what is it I need to learn in this wait? Trust seemed to be a major issue. In realizing I wasn’t really trusting in God, it led to several “What’s the meaning of life?” and “Why am I here?” type questions. Some questions I never thought I’d ask or didn’t know to ask. It made me ask myself, more than wanting what I want, do I want God? And if I chose myself over God, what does that mean for my life? I knew choosing myself over God was not a choice I wanted or was willing to make. So, since that was out of the question, I began to seek Him and learn what truly trusting in Him meant. Why would God want to give me something that would make me lean on it for identity?

As I began to relinquish my need to control, and allow myself to trust, God made it easier and easier to trust in Him. I thought a baby would bring the fulfillment and peace my heart desired; but peace and fulfillment came way before a baby came, through walking in trust with my God, who knows all, sees all and loves me dearly.

Before the baby loss, I was searching for “the next thing”. Continuing to set goals, small and large, and work toward them. Lots of selfish goals. This loss, trouble, has stretched me beyond what I thought life was, who I was, who God was and I’m so grateful. I have learned that Jesus is my only source for true peace and fulfillment, no matter what He does or doesn’t bless me with. As life goes on, and I’m continually faced with things outside of my control, I know that I am connected to the One who is in control, and I can trust Him completely.

Sommer Bradshaw
Reunion Counselor

Tedi

My friends, JT and Natalie, adopted their precious son, Tedi, from Ethiopia in 2010 and I wanted to share one of their blog posts with our Lifeline families:

A little over a year ago, Tedi had little identity. He was given up as a three year-old. He was a victim of the harsh realities of being born in a developing country. Tedi’s identity is no longer that as an orphan; he is an heir, handpicked, redeemed. Tedi is now an integral part of our family’s story. My identity is that I am no longer lost. No longer am I an orphan. The God of the universe loved me enough that He sent His only son to death. He sent His son to the cross so I could call him Daddy. This fact did not weigh heavily on me until I became a Dad. I cannot imagine allowing Tedi to die to save people who ridicule, mock or upset me. The exciting thing is that God feels this way about everyone who has ever lived!

Today, there is absolutely nothing that Tedi can do to separate from my love. It doesn’t matter how badly he acts or how many times he asks me “Why?” (by the way, we are at about 250 today- UGH!!!). The same can be said of my relationship with Jesus. No matter how many times I screw up (and people that know me know that is a lot), Jesus only loves me more. What an amazing example of unconditional love He shows each of us. The first moment I met Tedi, I got down on one knee and let him walk slowly to me. I embraced him and whispered in his ear, “Mommy and Daddy came a long way (I meant that both literally and figuratively) just for you, Tedi. We love you so much.” I felt him trembling in my arms; he was scared. I quietly started singing the chorus to one of my favorite songs:

“And I’ll be by your side whenever you fall, in the dead of night whenever you call. Please don’t fight these hands that are holding you. My hands are holding you.”

I find myself singing this song to him often. My hope is that one day, Tedi will realize that this song is not only being sung by a father to his son, but by our God to him.

Tedi knew no English when I first met him in Ethiopia. Our first few days together were like the world’s longest game of charades! I think it is a good thing that he could not communicate to me because, if he could, I am sure he would have said things like this in the first few days:

-“Who is this crazy white dude and why does he think he is funny?
-“Does he really think I am getting on this plane?"
-“Why are all these people cheering for me at the airport in Louisville? I can get used to this.”


One of the coolest things in adopting a child is watching him/her gradually (some slower than others) trusting their new family. Unlike if he had been born to us, Tedi had experienced life without us and was living as independently as a three year-old could. He did not and does not have to trust us. After nine months home, I still get chills when Tedi chooses to call me “Daddy.” When he first got home, he would wake up in the middle of the night and we would find him standing in the dark living room moaning pitifully. Gradually, he would come closer to our room if he woke up. After a month or so, he would stand at the foot of our bed and moan. I vividly remember the first time, instead of moaning, he yelled for his Daddy!!! Much like the process Tedi went through; I have gone through stages of trust with my Heavenly Father. I think God gets the same joy when I call him Daddy.

One thing that scared us before we met Tedi was the reports we received from other families who had visited with Tedi in his orphanage. Every one of them told us the same thing: Tedi was very shy, didn’t open up and was kind of a loner. Several described him as sad. Natalie and I were scared that perhaps he was severely traumatized by his experience and would suffer extreme attachment issues. Here are some pictures of Tedi before we met him.

Those of you that have met Tedi know that he could never be described as shy, closed off emotionally, or sad! When Tedi became a part of a family and had a Mommy and Daddy that loved him, everything changed for him. He went from being all alone to being accepted and loved. The same can be said of our relationship with Christ.

I am thankful that JT and Natalie shared their post with us. I am new to the Lifeline team and as an International Adoption Specialist; I am so excited that Lifeline is offering adoptions from ETHIOPIA! I have adopted two sweet boys from Ethiopia (2008 & 2010) and my family has fallen in love with the country and people of Ethiopia. With more than 5 million orphans in Ethiopia, there is such a huge need. This program is currently running about 12-15 months. Children from birth to 13 years old are available for adoption (HIV+ children are also available). If you have questions or would like more information on our Ethiopia program, click here, and please call (205) 967-0811. We look forward to telling you about Ethiopian adoptions and these sweet children.

Lesley Scott
International Adoption Specialist - Kentucky